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How Fast Can You Play That Game?

Thursday, September 28, 2006
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One of the things video-game phreaks like to do is record themselves doing something kick-ass in a game and post it on YouTube. One of the more popular categories for these postings is something called a Speed Run. This is basically an attempt to beat the game as quickly as possible. No power-ups or hidden levels or anything to slow you down — time is all that matters.

If you go to YouTube you can find tons of these, but since I’m such a nice guy I’m going to assemble a little collection here for you of some of the more entertaining ones to watch. As you can see, they’re mostly from the 8/16-bit generation of systems — the NES, or Genesis. The first reason for this is that these games are short enough that an accomplished Speed-Runner can finish one in roughly 15 mins or so, which, I feel, is a perfect viewing-time for the average Culturatti reader. If you want to see newer games, there are some Speed Runs broken up into chunks on YouTube that you can browse through.

The second reason is that I find watching these old games a nice trip down memory-lane, and I’ve been feeling a nostalgia vibe lately. Anyway — enough talking. Enjoy.

Bionic Commando (this game was once thought to be unbeatable — you’ll see it isn’t)

Mega Man

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (if I’m not mistaken, this was once thought to be unbeatable too)

Contra III — The Alien Wars (for the SNES — I LOVE this game — Beal and I used to play it a lot)

Since I was an avid Sega user in my time, here’s a Genesis one:

Sonice The Hedgehog 2

Since I’m an avid James Bond fan, here’s a Gamecube one:

James Bond 007: Agent Under Fire

Finally, I loved the game Ghouls & Ghosts for the Genesis; unfortunately, there are no Speed Runs for the Genesis version available. I did find one for the SNES version, though — however, it’s in six parts. So, if you’re interested, this is the link.

There — how many hours of your life are now gone forever because of this? Don’t worry — no one has to know. 03971semaj

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9 Comments leave one →
  1. Thursday, September 28, 2006 1:15 pm

    TMNT was never really considered unbeatable — just really god damn hard. I beat it once and only once. Even now, whenever I go to my Mum’s where the NES is still plugged in, I give it a go, only to be crushed by the security systems inside the Technodrome.

    Another motherfucker of an NES game starring man-sized brawling green waterdwellers? Battletoads. THAT one I never beat, even with a Game Genie. But I did recently see a speedrun that BLEW MY MIND.

    Just bare in mind that this (and possibly some of the above) are tool-assisted: Battletoads is actually being played in slow-motion with edits between levels and such.

  2. Thursday, September 28, 2006 1:23 pm

    Furthermore, you kinda have to mention Super Mario Bros. when you’re talking about speedrunning. Though Doom apparently was the first game to really have any popularity in speedrunning, SMB has gotta have the most videos out there. It’s like a science, the way these people blow through World 1-1. Watch this: it’s the natural extension of speedrunning — a Super Mario Bros. race, and infront of an audience to boot.

    Also, take a look at Wikipedia’s article on speedruning. It’s surprisingly extensive: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speedrun

  3. James17930 permalink
    Thursday, September 28, 2006 1:51 pm

    My God. You know, I think no matter what we think to do on here, Wikipedia’s already got us beat — in monumental ways.

    I’m gonna do my next post about Wikipedia and that’ll be the end of it.

  4. Friday, September 29, 2006 8:30 am

    Strange, just the other day I was thinking of that “SMB in under ten minutes” video that was floating around a few years back (not sure exactly why that popped into my head), et voila! you post this.

    I remember I gave up on Bionic Commando when a book I bought stated there was no way to beat the last boss, the so-called Frankenstein-like character. But after viewing that vid, he’s clearly got Hitler’s head.

  5. Friday, September 29, 2006 11:30 am

    Read the Wikipedia entry on Bionic Commando to find out why he’s got Hitler’s head.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bionic_Commando

    Hi James.

  6. James17930 permalink
    Friday, September 29, 2006 12:54 pm

    Again, Wikipedia to the rescue.

  7. James17930 permalink
    Friday, September 29, 2006 1:03 pm

    Yes!!

    The guy in Contra III even does ‘the pose’ when the plane swoops in in the first level.

    Awesome!

  8. Friday, September 29, 2006 3:26 pm

    It doesn’t count if you don’t do the pose. You gotta do the pose.

  9. tanya permalink
    Monday, October 2, 2006 10:20 am

    You know what’s sad? I have four hours to kill and georgebrown has banned youtube.com from being enjoyed. Don’t they know I don’t have internet access at home? james – I may sit outside your house someday soon. I want to see the games go fast!

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